I have been focused on the topic of Potholes On The Marital Highway and I want to continue that thought with this Marital Moment. I am using the marriage of Rachel and Jacob as the Biblical bases for this study. In the last Marital Moment I dealt with the Poor Communications of these two individuals by giving you the Reason For Poor Communications. Today, I want to continue, and conclude this topic, by looking at the Results Of Poor Communications and The Remedy For Poor Communications. In Genesis 30:1-2, Jacob and Rachel are in somewhat of an argument over Rachel's inability to bear children. This discussion seems to go from bad to worse. It provides excellent insight into how poor communication can result in negative things. The Results of Poor Commun-ication is readily seen in the (1) Constant Nagging of Rachel. I do not believer this is the only time she and Jacob had this conversation. The lack of children was an extremely sore spot for Rachel and perhaps it occupied a large portion of her time. The thought of her sister, Leah, having children was more than she could bear. Sadly, her poor husband received the brunt end of her assault. (2) A Quick Temper. A casual reading of this passage would readily identify the anger in her voice. It is extremely difficult to communicate when one partner is upset and angry. Anger seldom accomplishes nothing more than more anger. (3) A Demand-ing Attitude. Rachel demanded that Jacob do something about the situation. Un-fortunately, Jacob could not remedy the problem. A man usually pushes back or shuts down whenever someone demands something of him. He becomes more determined to resist whatever is being demanded of him and whoever is doing the demanding. (4) Bitter Remarks. Both their words were like knives plunging into the heart. When that happened neither of them was really communicating. They were only venting their frustrations toward each other. (5) Bad Choices. In Genesis 30:3-4, Rachel makes a terrible choice. She determined to give her ser-vant to Jacob as a wife in hope of having children of her. Sadly, Jacob was not making any better choices than Rachel was. The poor decision was made in anger, malice, haste, and frustration. The Remedy For Poor Communication is ex-tremely simple. (1) You must have unconditional love for each other. Proverbs 10:12 states, "Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins". Love reaches out with concern and compassion. (2) A Sympathetic Attitude. Jacob should have reached out to her and talked with her about the problem. She was hurting. A little sympathy would have gone a long way toward healing her broken heart. Instead he allowed it to fester and become a major obstacle in their home. (3) A Kind Response. Proverbs 15:1 states that, "A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. Jacob's response to Rachel was the truth but it was neither spoken in love nor kindness. Tenderness and kindness would have smooth-ed the rough places of their home. (4) A Forgiving Heart. Forgiveness is the salve that heals the wounds caused by verbal attacks. Poor Communications can certainly make for a rough and rocky road but good communications can turn difficult places into calm and quite surroundings.
